It's Only A Crime If You Get Caught

Amidst the twelve thoughts I had going to and returning from "7-11" just minutes ago there was one that really stuck with me. I am a believer in Christ. I believe He came, as God's son to save anyone who would choose His salvation. I believe that because of Him, our sins are forgiven. Whatever I do wrong, I can claim this forgiveness because of His love. I have known this almost my entire life. I ignored these truths until recently, but thats besides the point. One of the truths I believe is that I am forgiven despite my wrongdoings. Currently I am conflicted, though. Is one of those wrongdoings shame in the way my life is forming? Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for everything God has given me. My many gifts, and the extraordinary people that have been placed in my life. But I feel like I could do so much more with them. God has given me so much and I feel like I am wasting them. I feel like where I end up could be so far from where I am supposed to be. Is that even a sin? And if it is (which I feel is so) is that beyond forgiveness? Ignoring potential. Seeing a future with so much promise, but completely failing to even follow through in the smallest way. And if I do miss all of these opportunities could I ever forgive myself let alone claim the forgiveness of my creator?